Reflecting on Where I Am Now Compared to Before
Reflecting on Where I Am Now Compared to Before
Living Freely After Misophonia Held Me Back
There are moments in my day when I stop and think, Wow — how far I’ve come. And I mean that as humbly as possible.
Because when I was younger — just a child — I truly couldn’t imagine living a “normal” life. Something as simple as waking up and eating breakfast with my family felt impossible. That kind of everyday moment — laughing over coffee and half-burnt toast — felt completely out of reach.
The truth is, I had deep anxiety about any gathering that involved food. The thought alone was enough to make my heart race, let alone actually showing up and sitting through it. I lived in fear of the sounds that others never even noticed — chewing, slurping, swallowing, burping. Misophonia took up so much space in my life, and it cast a shadow over moments that were supposed to be joyful.
A normal life — one with shared meals, spontaneous plans, and comfort around others — didn’t feel like it was in the cards for me. At least, not then.
Now, I’m a young adult. And I’m thriving.
I no longer carry the same weight I used to. I can eat with family and friends — anytime, anywhere. I’m no longer hyper-aware, bracing myself for every sound. I’m not giving myself internal pep talks or scanning the room for threats. I’m just present. And free.
And even though I live that freedom daily, the contrast still hits me sometimes. I’ll be driving to meet friends at a restaurant, and out of nowhere I’ll think — I used to avoid this. I used to fear this. And now here I am, just... doing it. And not only doing it, but enjoying it.
Those are the moments that mean the most to me. They might seem small on the surface — choosing a seat at a crowded table, sitting next to someone who used to trigger me, or hearing someone burp without spiraling — but they’re monumental when I think about how far I’ve come.
I reflect on it often. Sometimes it’s just a quiet smile to myself when I sit down at a dinner table, knowing what it took to get here. Sometimes it’s a moment of deep gratitude at night, after a full day of social interaction, realizing I didn’t have to fight through it. I got to be present — fully.
Final Thoughts: A Life Beyond Misophonia Is Possible
If you’re someone who’s struggling with misophonia right now, I want you to know that change is possible. It won’t be easy, and it won’t be instant — but it’s real. The freedom you dream of might look different than mine, but it’s worth fighting for.
Healing doesn’t always look dramatic. Sometimes it looks like laughing over coffee and half-burnt toast.
And that, to me, is everything.