How I came to this.

When I first thought about writing a book on misophonia and my experience with it, there wasn’t much information out there. At least, not like there is now. That was over ten years ago. Back then, misophonia felt like a secret — something few people knew about or talked about. Now, every time I search "misophonia," there’s a growing sea of content. Just today, I Googled “misophonia book” and found several titles published in the past few years alone.

I bring this up because now, I’m finally contributing to that sea. I’m adding my voice, my perspective, and hopefully something valuable to others who are navigating the same struggle. I want to offer not just a story, but a guide — the kind I wish I had.

Years ago, after I first overcame misophonia, I had the idea to write a book. I even had the title: Tiger at The Table. That name never left me. But my momentum stopped there.

At the time, I assumed I’d have to show my face, be public. I wasn’t ready for that. Looking back, I probably could’ve stayed anonymous or used a pen name. But truthfully, I just wanted to move on with life. I had overcome something that felt impossible, and some part of me believed I deserved to leave it all behind.

So, I shelved the book idea. But I held on to the title.

The name for this blog (and eventually my book) came from an analogy my childhood therapist used. He compared what I felt while sitting at a table with people eating to what a "normal" person would feel if there were a tiger sitting at that same table. That fight-or-flight response that occurs when someone eats around me— that’s what my misophonia is like. My dad and I fit the analogy into the phrase Tiger at The Table.

Even after I overcame misophonia, I kept it hidden. Many of my closest friends still don’t know about it. At the time, it felt like the best way to protect myself. I’d made it through hell, and now I just wanted to live normally. Occasionally, I’d open up to those I was comfortable around.

That changed a bit during freshman orientation at Florida State University. For the first time, I shared my story publicly with a group of complete strangers. It wasn’t planned, but it was empowering. For someone who rarely spoke about this issue, that moment marked a shift for me.

In 2020, I started at FSU as an international affairs major (for reasons I still can’t quite explain). But soon after, I switched to a healthcare track. Then the pandemic hit. Classes went online, and I wasn’t ready to tackle STEM courses virtually. So, I pivoted to business. I switched my undergrad path several times. It was a time of change.

Before transferring to Bluefield University to continue wrestling (something I had wanted to give a shot), I found myself drawn back to writing. For the first time, I opened up to my roommates about my experience with misophonia and how it had sparked my interest in medicine and mental health. Around that time, I also enrolled in a crisis counseling course and began outlining ideas for a book

Competing in wrestling again was incredibly rewarding, and I needed that chapter in my life. But, that spark that was lit the semester prior when I had talked to my roommates about why I was wanting to pursue something in healthcare had to wait a bit. I stayed on track to get a business degree, only this time in education.

Still, while at Bluefield, I had a new idea: a blog. I started planning a site called Tiger at The Table — a space to share my journey and connect with others. After returning home, I picked back up with school at FSU, pursued a business degree, coached wrestling, worked, trained MMA, and... once again, my motivation fell to the side.

Eventually, about a year later, I realized I’d let too much time slip by. I re-enrolled in the crisis counselor program, completed the course, and launched my first version of the Tiger at The Table blog. It was going well — until life got busy again. I graduated, started working full-time, and slowly pulled back from blogging and volunteering as a crisis counselor.

Then something shifted again. I had decided to pursue medical school, even if that meant doing it non-traditionally. I enrolled in pre-med classes — starting with trigonometry and biology 1 lab, then moving on to complete both chemistry 1 and chemistry 2 as well as their labs, and physics 1 and physics 2 as well as their labs. Now, I’m preparing to take upper-level science courses, and the idea for Tiger at The Table has returned.

I’m back to blogging, but this time I’m doing it differently — simply, sustainably, and at my own pace. I’m also writing the book again, but I’m not rushing. This time, I want to get it right.

I want to tell my story through the lens of core memories — real moments shaped by misophonia. I also want to create a practical, honest guide for others: something that can help people not only understand misophonia but actively work through it. I’ve even thought about building a course in the future, but I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.

My first draft of the book — the one I lost when my computer failed — wasn’t bad. But I know I can do better. The world is finally talking about misophonia. If I’m going to add to the conversation, I want to make it count.

So here I am, doing just that.